A woman called about a job in drums pennsylvania. It has a night shift and it does the kind of stuff I want to do.\u00a0 In all ways, it is perfect for me but I can’t bring myself to call back.\u00a0 I dial the number and look at it then decide not to.\u00a0 Then I dial the number again and repeat.\u00a0 I don’t want a repeat of what happened at walmart and I know that is what is on the way.\u00a0 Not only that but I am no longer normal not that I was ever very normal but this is new.\u00a0 I went to the mcdonald’s and twice now people interacted with me.\u00a0 Not just people but people I didn’t know.\u00a0 One was a young woman at the drive thru who actually started a more then pleasant conversation.\u00a0 Freaked me out completely and then there was the hi the gentleman gave me in passing.\u00a0 Both times it was borderline anxiety attack.\u00a0 I got called a freak well driving and that kind of relaxed me and made me feel things were getting back to normal.<\/p>\n
I have to break this desire to be isolated.\u00a0 This job in drums is my dream.\u00a0 It is perfect in every way and yet when I put the number in the phone it is always the same thought.<\/p>\n
“They are just going to be abusive till I leave.\u00a0 No good is going to come of taking this job.\u00a0 They don’t want you to work.\u00a0 They want you to be abused by them.”<\/p>\n
The other side of the argument is:<\/p>\n
“I know I have to take the chance eventually and stalling is just making it worse so why waste time.\u00a0 Just get it over with.\u00a0 Call back take the job.\u00a0 You will be on the phone the whole time so their abuse will be limited.”<\/p>\n
The third voice is the stupidest one of all.<\/p>\n
“Maybe you will get lucky and they won’t want you.\u00a0 You make the call back and they deny you and done.”<\/p>\n
I don’t want to do that though because it just wastes the ladies time and she was nice enough to call back the most hated guy in the world.\u00a0 \u00a0Do you really want to reward someone who takes time out of their day to investigate hiring the most hated guy in the world.\u00a0 That is a nice thing to do especially since it is known by everyone I am hated world round so she knows who she is calling.<\/p>\n
This is type of indecisiveness and anxiety is the gift of the traffic and I treasure it oh so very much.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
A woman called about a job in drums pennsylvania. It has a night shift and it does the kind of stuff I want to do.\u00a0 In all ways, it is perfect for me but I can’t bring myself to call back.\u00a0 I dial the number and look at it then decide not to.\u00a0 Then I … <\/p>\n